Tuesday, January 31, 2006

A Parable: In Search of the Perfect Woman

Last weekend was grueling. By the Sunday afternoon I felt physically and emotionally exhausted. I suppose that my fatigue became an impediment to the sleep that I did not experience Sunday night. By Monday morning, I had flu-like symptoms. But life must go on. I fed Alex and let him outside twice. In between serving my master, the cat, I responded to comments left on three or four days worth of blog posts.

As I read what people wrote, I was reminded of stories—parables—that speak to the issues in those posts. I have decided to share those stories.

The one I am sharing today relates to the post My Perfect Lover. A comment made by Sheeesh reminded me of a story by Anthony de Mello about a man who spent his life seeking the ideal woman. The following isn’t the exact de Mello parable; it is my recreation of it:

Michael: Nick, I have always wondered why you have never remarried.

Nick: After my first experience with marriage, I decided not to marry again unless I found the perfect woman. The first woman I found was physically perfect—she could have been Playboy’s Playmate of the Year. Unfortunately, she had the temperament of a shrew. She was controlling, quarrelsome, nagging, and constantly ill-tempered. So I left her and sought another woman.

The second woman I found had the soul of an angel. She was kind. loving, gentle, and had the temperament of a saint. Unfortunately, she was physically the ugliest human being I have ever encountered. So I left her and sought another woman.

The third woman I found was ideal in every way. She had the face of an angel. the body of the Playmate of the Century, and the disposition of a Mother Teresa. She was absolutely the perfect woman!

Michael: Ah! So why did you not marry her?

Nick: Unfortunately, she was searching for the perfect man.


  1. I think that story is true for many of us. It is for me.

  2. haha, well even the third chick probably had issues. hang in there, and maybe the "right" woman will come along
    ps: if it says a comment was deleted it was because of an un healthy amount of typos lol

  3. ya, searching for 'perfection' in general can be a let down. Finding the perfect one for you, its doable.

    I never thought i'd find it. Then, I realized it was more my issues than any males.

    Odd how life works.

  4. So very true! I am so glad I never wanted "perfection!"

  5. I hope you find one that is just right for you.

  6. Azsonofagun—I agree, Rex. Although, I seldom seek perfection in anything—or anyone.

    Sheeesh—I think she probably did have issues. Don’t we all?

    For me, the “perfect” woman has come along several times. Of course, my definition of “perfection” is much different that the character in de Mello’s parable!

    Lawbrat—If by “finding the perfect one” you mean the one with whom one is a soul mate, I agree. Perfection for me has little to do with looks or even personality. It has more to do with one’s soul. Sometimes I believe that I can see the soul of another by looking into her eyes. Of course, I may be kidding myself.

    I agree. Usually the issues we have with others are more the result of our projecting our own issues upon them than something within them.

    Abby—Me, too!

    Tuesday Girl—Welcome to my blog! I believe that I have found the right one for me several times. Perhaps the next time whoever she is will find that I am the right one for her!

  7. You must post pictures of the cat! It's a blogger thing doncha know - Friday dog and/or cat blogging! I'm about to post one in a few minutes myself since I won't be home 'til late tomorrow night.

    As for the post and the one before this one: beautiful. I love parables as there is often a lot of truth in them. And it's usually when we stop looking for the *perfect* other that we find them.