A New House for Mom

The happiest moments of my life have been the few which I have passed at home in the bosom of my family. ~ Thomas Jefferson

Those who have been reading Nick’s Bytes for a while may remember that last December my mother went to the emergency room after sliding out of her chair. From there she went into two different rehabilitation centers, the first here in Louisville and the second near my sister’s home in Elizabethtown, Kentucky. She remained in that rehab center until last Monday, when she moved into her new home in Elizabethtown.

Due to the distance (and the heat, which is overbearing for me, especially since the air conditioning in my car is broken), I’ve not yet visited Mom in her new home. I have spoken with her via telephone. Her house is half of a duplex and is “handicapped-friendly” for those who have mobility problems.

Still, she misses the home she owned in Louisville and in which she lived for almost fifty-one years, where the memories of her husband and children still reside.

MEME Reprise

The Bachelor at Wellington has invited (sounds better than tagged, doesn’t it) me to do a MEME that is similar to Five 5 Five 5 Five MEME I completed on June 5^th. I am challenging myself to do it again without repeating any of the answers I used in the other one.

What was I doing 10 years ago.
Ten years ago I visited Tucson, Arizona, for the first time and spent a week at a desert retreat center taking the first certification course to be qualified as an intentional interim minister.

Five of my favorite snacks

Five things on my to do list today

1. Telephone son, Nick: Today is his 37^th birthday
2. Telephone son, Rob: Today is his 33^rd birthday
3. Figure out how to access external hard drive E
4. Give Alex his every-other-day medicine
5. Write a blog post for today

Things I would do if I were a billionaire
Same as last time: give 99% of it away (Some things just don’t change)

Five (more) jobs that I've had

1. Assistant Night Club Manager
2. Battalion Adjutant
3. Battalion Intelligence Officer
4. History Teacher
5. Chairperson, City of Cannelton (Indiana) Historic Preservation Commission

Five bad habits of mine

1. Trusting folks who then lie and steal from me.
2. Falling in love too fast
3. Falling out of love too slowly
4. Forgetting to take care of myself
5. Rushing in where even fools fear to tread

Five (more) places I've lived

1. Elizabethtown, Kentucky
2. Washington, D.C.
3. Kutzberg, Germany
4. Webster Groves, Missouri
5. Cannelton, Indiana

Five random things people wouldn't know about me

1. I injured my shoulder so badly playing high school football that I couldn’t play my senior year.
2. My first dog’s name was Boo-Boo.
3. I commanded the University of Kentucky’s Pershing Rifles Confederate Squad that defeated Ohio States’ Pershing Rifles Union Squad in a mock Civil War battle twice while under my command.
4. I was voted Most Likely to Succeed my senior year in high school.
5. As a pastor, I have officiated more funerals than I have weddings and baptisms combined.

Five CDs that I'd have to have on a desert island
Kingston Trio: Greatest Hits

Gordon Lightfoot: Gord’s Gold

Phil Ochs: Pleasures of the Harbor

Harry Chapin: The Gold Medal Collection

Peter, Paul, and Mary in Concert



People I want to get to know better
See the Exceptional Blogs list on my sidebar

Wednesday Mishmash & a Bawdy Song

So much has been happening so fast that I have a dozen posts mushing up my brain. To unmush my brain, I'm putting some mishmash here!

Mom's Birthday

My mother was 87-yesrs-old on March 1st. She is doing remarkably well. We talk at least once a day and I look forward to Spring when I hope to drive the 85 miles to visit her.

CPAP Mask

As I have previously written, I cannot sleep wearing my current CPAP mask. I obtained this one the last time I was hospitalized and never used it because I had a working mask. When that mask broke, I began using the full-face one from the hospital. There is something about coverning my nose and mouth that disturbs me. I do fall asleep, but within less than an hour I awaken in a panicked state and must immediately shed the mask. I gotta get that new mask!

Meals on Wheels

I'm also working on getting Meals on Wheels. My mother explained how easy it was for her to praticipate in the program in Elizabethtown, Kentucky. Here is Louisville the program is much larger. And, guess what I have again learned? The bigger the community means a bigger program with a larger bureacracy and (many) more hoops through one must jump.

Have I Shared this Photo?

Sometimes I brush Alex's coat while we cuddle; sometimes, as above, Alex combs my beard with his claws.

Coffee House

I enjoyed creating last Wednesday's Coffee House; however, putting together such a post is  is quite a jib. So there isn't a coffee house today. Perhaps there will be one next Wednesday.

In the meantime remember to check out the Song in My Mind Today on the sidebar...

and enjoy the song embedded below (WARNING: Bawdy Song):

Mandy Lane ~ Chad Mitchell Trio

And remember:

Mark Twain

Survivor of Benign Neglect

There are numerous bloggers, such as Squirl, who post magnificent photographs of flowers. I would not attempt to emulate the photographs of those artful bloggers; I'm not a skilled photographer nor a gardener. I know a bit about lawns because I spent the summers of my undergraduate college years working with grass (and sand traps) on Louisville golf courses.

I also learned about growing roses from my German uncle, Otto Weber. His rose garden was wonderful and he taught me about pruning, fertilizing, watering, and protecting rose from the numerous pests and diseases that can attack them. I learned the lessons well.

Through the years I come to ritually accept that where I live as "home" by planting roses. At the house I owned in Elizabethtown, Kentucky, I created a three tier rose garden and was a rose tester for the Jackson-Perkins company. I planted roses in the yard of the parsonage in Cannelton, Indiana. On the terrace of the apartment in which I lived when I first returned to Louisville, I had planters of miniature roses. On reflection, I find it strange that I have not been motivated to plant roses at the at the home I now own.

This post is not about the roses that I have planted and tended through the past thirty or so years. It is about a rose bush beside my mother's house that has survived about fifty years in spite of benign neglect:


The rose bush pictured above was purchased from a grocery store for about fifty cents in (I believe) the spring of 1957, about six months after my parents moved into the house. To the best of my knowledge, it has not been pruned, sprayed, or fertilized in many, many years. It has also not been dug up, which is the benign part of its continued existence.

I cannot explain why this bush continues to exist in spite of the neglect it has received. I am not a horticulturist. I do not know if this bush will bloom. Yet I have deep respect for a rose bush that has survived so long without being tended. Although I am tempted, I will not prune it or fertilize it. I will respect it, this survivor of benign neglect.

Ruminating on Mothers' Day

Ruminate [transitive verb]

1: to go over in the mind repeatedly and often casually or slowly

2 to chew repeatedly for an extended period

For the past several days I have been thinking about Mothers' Day.Here are a few of the thoughts that have come to my mind.

My Mother: Katherine "Pat" Hertle Temple

My mother is 90-years-young. Like me, she lives alone and, with the assistance of a few folks coming into her condo, she is self-sufficient. She lives in Elizabethtown, Kentucky, which is about 50 miles from me. It has been more than a year since I have seen Mom, primarily because I can't trust my 12-year-old Honda CR-V to make it there and back. I do, however, speak to her daily by telephone, one of the high points of my day.

I believe I am quite lucky to have a living mother. All of my grandparents were deceased by the time I was 8-years-old. My father died while I was studying in seminary in St. Louis 30 years ago. Mom is my primary living connection to my past. I love her dearly and pray that she has a wonderful Mother's Day!

Mothers

I think about those mothers who have sons and daughter serving in the military overseas, risking their lives each day. Thankfully, neither of my sons served in the military, so I don't know first hand the worry and traumatic thoughts a parent has knowing that their child is risking her/his life.  

My Dad and Mom at my commissioning as a U.S. Army officer in 1969

And, of course  there are those mothers who are separated from their children because they are serving their nation.

It must be difficult for any mother to be separated from her children, especially on Mothers' Day.

Surrogate Mothers

There is a line in the United Church of Christ Book of Worship's Prayer of Thanksgiving in the Order for Marriage that reads:

We thank you for our own parents, and for all, whether married or single, who are mothers or fathers to us, as we grow in the fullness of the stature of Christ.

As I grew, there were aunts and uncles who loved and parented me, teaching and giving me more than I can ever repay. I remember and thank them on this Mothers Day.

Al Jolson, Mammy, from The Jazz Singer

Please?

Giving Thanks

I have a multitude of items for which I am thankful since last Thanksgiving, beginning with human beings.

The Rev. Richard Pearson, who is my new pastor—even though I have yet to

worship at Faith United Church of Christ due to my numerous infirmities—has been a true Angel in my life since my April 12 falls. He has visited me in hospital and rehab Center, driven me to medical appointments, cleaned my apartment (many, many times), fed my Kitty Kids and kept their litter box clean and filled with fresh cat litter. He has always been willing and able to assist in various projects, from putting together furniture to assisting Jenny and taking my humongous wheelchair out of storage and placing it in the back of my CR-V. Richard has been willing to come to me almost every time I have needed him. For example, on Tuesday I attempted to take a bath for only the third time since I moved into this apartment and the first time since my April 12 injuries. That was because there has been lots of lime clogging up the water system and I have been unable to obtain a good flow from my shower head making showering almost impossible. The bath was a wonderful experience; however, we encountered a major problem when I attempted to get out of the bathtub. I couldn’t! So Jenny telephoned Richard and he came to my apartment where he and Jenny attempted to lift me out of the tub. So they called 911 and a couple of strong men got me out of the tub. Richard stayed around until he was sure that I was okay. The Richard Pearson has brought God’s love and grace into my life. I am extremely thankful for all that he has done for me and the Kitty Kids.

I see my son, Nick, too infrequently. However, he came to me when I was in 

the

hospital and rehab Center. Nick is the first person I saw when I came out of the 12(?) day coma in the ICU. He visited me regularly throughout April and May. He was at a restaurant nearby when I was given permission to eat solid food and drink non-thickened water. I telephoned Nick and he brought me the first solid food I ate after the ordeal of thickened water and mushy food. I am extremely thankful and proud of my firstborn, Nicholas Lawrence Temple III.

I am also thankful for my ex-wife, Janel, being present so often at the hospital and rehab Center. She assisted me in understanding things that my battered brain could not. When it was determined that I have prostate cancer, she went with me to numerous appointments with pathologist, oncologists, and urologists. Even though she stated that she did not think I am grateful for all that she has done during my illness, I am extremely thankful to Janel.

I am thankful to my retired former pastor and colleague, the Rev. Doug Fowler. Throughout the years he has been more supportive than I can express. He has come to me when I have been in need, talked with me when I have been confused, given me advice that was much needed, and been a true pastor and friend. Now that Doug is retired, I have much less contact with him. I remain thankful for his bringing God’s grace and love into my life.

My sister, Debbie Bennett, is a blessing. Because of the age (14 years) and questionable reliability of my car, I am unable to visit my mom and heart nursing home in Elizabethtown. Debbie visits mom just about every day and cares for her in ways that I wish I could. I am extremely thankful for my little sister.

 

 

I have known Jenny Renee DePierro several years through a mutual friend.

However, it is only been in the last several weeks that I have begun to know her well. She had a need: a safe place to live. I had a need: a house keeper and caregiver. We are now meeting both of our needs. I am extremely thankful for all that Jenny is doing, which is really keeping me out of a nursing home.

There are lots of other people to whom I am most thankful. These are too numerous for me to name individually. They consist of my doctors and nurses; the volunteers to bring my Meals on Wheels; my friends on Facebook and Twitter; my fellow bloggers; my friends who are actively working for justice and peace; folks here in my apartment complex. In many ways, they too have been messing jurors from God to me. I am most thankful for them.

I have some nonhuman friends for which I am very, very thankful. They are my Kitty Kids. Alex has been with me 11 years; I love him dearly. Midnight was born in this apartment. She is still a young kitten and very entertaining. Unfortunately, Sugar and escape the apartment while I was in hospital or nursing home. I pray for her safety and hope for her return. LG (Little Girl) escaped the apartment just after her kittens were weaned. She is a young cat without Sugar’s street smarts. I pray for her safety and hope for her return. My Kitty Kids are my closest companions. I love each one dearly and am thankful for their being with me.

ALEX

 

 

 

 

 

MIDNIGHT

SUGAR

LITTLE GIRL

Friday Mishmash & Updates

Blogger Finally Allowed Me to Switch

As of 6:30 p.m. yesterday, Nick’s Bytes is now in the “new” Blogger format. If you have any problems accessing it (I assume you didn’t or you’d not be reading this) or posting comments, let me know. (See my profile for my email address).

Alex the Hulk

I seem to be creating a monster cat! Since I purchased Alex a box of his favorite cat food (which he had not had for several weeks) he continually harasses (read: “claws") me for more and more of it. The first day I fed it to him, he demanded it over and over to the point I fed him six packets during the day (that’s 18 oz). He then heaved most of it up on the kitchen floor.

The feeding instructions on the packets read: “1 oz/85 g per pound of (cat) weight.” That means that I over fed Alex by about 7 oz. I thought that cats, unlike dogs, stopped eating when they were full!

The same day I overfed the cat that controls my life I followed a Google Adsense ad on my blog and took a test regarding Mr. Alex’s health. Basically the results said that I am a good cat mommy (?) and give Alex exceptional care except that the little fir ball is a bit overweight as determined by his profile which includes having a round belly. (Hell! I have big round belly, just like Santa Claus).

Since reading that, I have restricted Mr. Alex’s feeding to two packets of the Friskies pouches supplemented by his dry cat food. I am also paying for it, with (1) a broken ceramic cat dish (Alex pushed the empty dish off his cat table onto the floor) and (2) cat scratches on my legs (the results of not jumping up and feeding Alex when he so demands).

Does anyone know of a good cat psychologist? I need to advice!

How to Speak/Interpret Aussie

With today (or yesterday if you’re in Australia) being Australia Day, I decided I needed to learn Australian English. So I did a Google search and came up with this site: Aussie Slang.

Update: Mom

My mother remains in the rehab center in Elizabethtown, Kentucky. I miss her; however she doesn’t want to expend the gasoline necessary to visit. Actually, she is reluctant to have any visitors, including her grandchildren and great-grandchildren. She says that visitors tire her out and she is already exhausted from the physical therapy.

Still, I speak with her by telephone (she has her cell phone by the bed and that makes it a local call from Louisville) three or four times each day. Her mood changes: during one call she is optimistic about returning to her home; then she sounds as if she has not hope of ever returning home.

As a therapist and pastor who has worked extensively with the elderly, I can understand this. Much demands on how she feels at any given moment. If I speak to her when she is in pain (back pain from pinched nerves or stomach pain from the meds), she is pessimistic. If she is not in pain, she is optimistic. I wish I had a prognosis from the rehab staff; unfortunately, they are noncommittal.

The Employment Picture

After learning that my application to the Board of Education had been purged after I chose to sell insurance rather than teach, I have resubmitted my application. It seems that I must start from scratch and cannot be placed on the substitute teacher call list until I have attended another orientation. There is no orientation scheduled until after Spring Break. That being the case, I have also begun to submit my teaching application to other school systems.

I’m in the process of updating my pastoral profile (I’m trained as an “intentional interim” pastor). The process has become more complex and expensive since I last updated it. For example, I must obtain and pay for a criminal records check. It seems the criminal records checks I had done for the Board of Education and the Kentucky Insurance Commission last year are not acceptable. How many times must I prove that I am not a criminal?

I also continue to submit my resume for social work positions. Even with a master’s degree in social work, there seems to be a lot of competition, for these jobs. I begin to wonder if my age (I’ll been 61 in less than a month) reduces my desirability.

The only recent job interviews I had are for insurance positions and each of these requires me to pay the insurance company for the privilege of selling their insurance. That how it was with Liberty National Life Insurance Company: I spent over $800.00 to obtain that position. At the last interview I attended (Farmers Insurance), the initial cost of working for the company was about $1600.00.

Prayer for my Mother

During today's afternoon physical therapy, my mother collapsed at the rehab center. She was taken by ambulance to the local hospital. Her physician, who also happens to be my physician, telephoned me and urged me to come to the hospital. My two sons and I drove the the fifty miles or so from Louisville to Elizabethtown as fast as possible.

When we arrived, Mom was still in the emergency room. What had initially been diagnosed as a heart attack had been determined to be blood clots in her lungs-"the largest I've ever seen," said her physician. By the time we got to the hospital, Mom was two hours in to treatment with a blood thinning medication. The physician has told my sister that, if Mom made it through the first four hours of the treatment, the prognosis was good.

Mom was in surprisingly good spirits. She told me that, when she thought she was dying, she had prayed that God would forgive any "bad things" she had done to people during her life and had calmly awaited death.

We stayed at the hospital for approximately seven hours. Mom's only surviving brother, his wife and one of his daughters also came from Louisville. By the time we left the hospital (my sister is remaining in Mom's hospital room) Mom was well into the treatment, had eaten, and was ready for sleep. The crisis, however, is not yet over.

Loving and merciful God,
grant the assurance to my mother than you are with her now.
Give the gift of quiet and rest;
pour forth the renewal of strength;
give the refreshment of sleep and relief from suffering.
Comfort those of us who wait,
that when this is all past,
we may praise your glorious name;
through Jesus Christ.
Amen.

(adapted from Book of Worship: United Church of Christ)

What to Do This Weekend

I have had an extra long and fairly difficult week. The weekend has come and I am forced to slow down....not because I work for someone who allows weekend off, but because the agencies and bureaucrats with whom I am dealing have the weekend off.

Sooooo, what am I to do?

Yesterday I read Moonbeam McQueen's bog post entitled Fo Reel. The first two lines of her opening poem are:

I bought myself a fishing pole,
I wanna find a fishing hole,

It doesn't take much imagination to imagination what Ms. McQueen has om her mind. I can easily see in my mind the times I have been fishing... during lunch brakes at Burnheim Forrest, which is located a few miles from the Shepherdsville, Kentucky, office where I supervised social serves in the 1970s and '80s. And the times, as a small kid, I fished the Ohio River with my Uncle Otto, And especially the too few times I took my sons Nick and Rob fishing at the lake near where we lived in Elizabethtown, Kentucky. Yep, I could go fishin'...

Gone Fishin  ~ Bing Crosby and Louis Armstrong

 Red River Gorge (Kentucky)

I could also go hiking, perhaps on some of the short trails in Louisville's parks, or longer ones at one of the Commonwealth's parks, or even wild one such as Red River Gorge. I love hiking! However, to hike one should be able to walk and my legs have gotten to the point over the past few days that I find very painful even to stand. Yucky!

I could play with Alex. Matter of fact, I have played with Alex, as I do every day. Earlier today I noticed that the glove with long strands and balls (still) attached to some of them was off the table where it was sitting in the entrance way and on the floor.

I could play with Alex. Hmmm, I asked myself, how did that get down there? Of course I knew how it got from the table to the floor: Alex. I left the glove on the floor and, a bit later, I saw Alex sitting on the glove and swiping at the strings with his paws.

Sooooo, I picked up the glove from beneath my furball and we went outside to the porch and played...

...until my little fellow became tired of the game.

I could cook outside, but I've no charcoal or anything to cook.

Besides, I really don't enjoy cooking only for myself. 

I could read. I have lots of books in my library. Well, I did read this afternoon and finished Chelsea Handler's Chelsea, Chelsea Bang, Bang. It is a fast and fun read and I recommend it for your summer smiles and laughs.

Chelsea, Chelsea, Bang, Bang

 

Click on one of Chelsea's books above and save $10.00+ on its purchase from Amazon.com

 I could play my guitar. Actually, I have played it today. The arthritis is my left had is making it difficult, but depending on the song, I'm still fairly good. My voice, however, with the nose hose is another (and sad) story.

Finally, I could nap, which is exactly how I have spent most of this Saturday. If I hadn't, the post would have gone up at 8:00 a.m. rather than the present 8:00 p.m.!